Friday, April 10, 2009

Crazy cult leader creates "Potato Day"

Oh hello, Andrew Breitbart. Remember me? We went to that rich, preppy high school together and you came and saw my band once and you turned into a crazy internet neocon and I said some nasty things about you and you had all of your commenter minions threaten me on this blog. I kind of thought we were done with one another after our little dustup in February, but you keep showing up on my TV screen.

First I caught you on Real Time with Bill Maher where you performed the thankless service of defending George W. Bush's legacy. The national near-consensus that Dubya was the Worst President in U.S. History could not dissuade you. I have to say I sort of admire your perserverance in ideological pursuits, unburdened as it is by facts or truth or common sense.

This week, Jon Stewart took notice of you and your (surely entirely true) televised complaint that your son's liberal pussy Obamatard school no longer recognizes St. Patrick's Day, but instead refers to it as "Potato Day". Haha that's funny because that would be like liberals deciding to rename Cinco de Mayo to Sleeping Dude Under a Sombrero Day.

Andrew, you dissemble, you demagogue, you divert. You've chosen to use your apparently vast inherited wealth to create a cult of wingnut internet wackos. You're not wasting your life. Even worse, you are using it to fuck up the world as much as your trust fund will allow.

We're still waiting for your evidence on the whole "Potato Day" thing. I've searched the internet high and low and all I can find is people commenting on your TV appearance. Then the comments turn into rants about how stupid "Potato Day" is. God you're good.

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